The 2012 Shmebula Awards, Part 2

As I noted yesterday, I recently decided to read all 12 YA/MG books on the Andre Norton Award shortlist so I could vote in this year's Nebula Awards without being a complete ignoramus. After accomplishing this goal, I came up with my own extremely silly awards so more of these fine books could get recognition.

And so, without further ado, let us continue

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The 2012 Shmebula Awards*

*Warning: The following awards are even sillier than yesterday's, which is saying a lot. You won't find any major spoilers below, so don't worry if you haven't yet read all twelve books on the list.

Protagonist With the Most-tagonist

Nominees:

A (Every Day)
Cassel (Black Heart)
Evie (The Diviners)
Liyana (Vessel)
Sunday (Enchanted)

WINNER:

There were so many great protagonists in these 12 books. Just look at this lineup. I loved A's empathy, Sunday's sweetness, Liyana's strength, and Cassel's smart-aleckyness. (Anyone who's read Hammer of Witches knows I can't resist a good smart-aleck.) But I'm giving this one to Evie. She is a delight. A delight I tells ya!

*****

Kickin'est Sidekick (or Secondary Character)

Nominees:

Demetrius (Iron Hearted Violet)
Hoku (Above World)
Rhiannon (Every Day)
Sam (Black Heart)
Theta (The Diviners)

WINNER:

Demetrius. He is too cute. Three cheers for boy characters who upend expectations by being good leaders who are also sweet and kind (and, in this case, nice to animals). Come to think of it, Demetrius and Hoku would make good friends. Sam could be their big brother, Rhiannon could be the cool big sis, and Theta can watch them all while making witty but world-weary comments from the sidelines. Yes. Yes! I smell a fanfic.

*****

Villain Most Likely to Make You Wet Yourself In Fear

Nominees:

Corner (Above)
Fathom (Above World)
John Hobbes (The Diviners)
Nybbas – Especially the part with the lizards. If you read it you know what I mean. Euuugh. (Iron Hearted Violet)
Reverend Poole (Every Day)

WINNER:

John Hobbes, and I can't really say anything more without spoiling things. I will say, though, that I was tempted to pick Reverend Poole, because even though he wasn't nearly as important a character, he might have scared me slightly more, because I can almost imagine him existing in real life.

*****

The Obi Wan Memorial Prize for Best Reasonable Authority Figure

Nominees:

Doctor Marybeth (Above)
Grandad Desi (Black Heart)
Mama (Enchanted)
Orma (Seraphina)
Will (The Diviners)

WINNER:

Grandad Desi. He's a cool guy, and probably the least evil person in that family (although to be fair that's not a really high bar to clear).

*****

Worst Parents

Nominees:

Aluna's Dad, a.k.a. Mr. Yeah-Sure-Let's-Let-Our-Whole-Race-Die-Whaddaya-Gonna-Do? (Above World)
Cassel's Mom, a.k.a. Mrs.-I'm-An-Emotional-Manipulator-Who-Raised-Her-Sons-to-Be-Sociopaths (Black Heart)
Ephraim's Mom, a.k.a. Ms.-Alcoholics-Anonymous-What's-That? (Fair Coin)
Evie's Mom, and I can't say why without spoiling things, but it has to do with World War I (The Diviners)
The Sisters' Papá, a.k.a. Sr.-Adios-Chicas-I-Have-Better-Things-To-Do-Than-Pay-Child-Support (Summer of the Mariposas)

WINNER:

Papá. What's worse than a deadbeat dad? A deadbeat dad who keeps coming back. The crap he pulls in this book... I can't even. I had planned to use some choice words in Spanish to describe this dude, but I was told to keep things clean. So I'll just say he's a butt. A big stinkin' butt.

*****

The “If You Were Ten Years Older and Not Fictional” Award for ZOMG!! Cute Boyz!!1!

Nominees:

Cassel (Black Heart)
Korbyn (Vessel)
Memphis (The Diviners)
Rumbold (Enchanted)
Sam (The Diviners)

WINNER:

This one required a chart.

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Okay, it didn't really require a chart, but my time writing for OverthinkingIt.com has made me chart-happy. So who's my pick?

I'm going to have to go with Korbyn by default, because being a god he's the only one who's technically an adult. I ain't no cradle robber! By the way, young people who may be reading this blog post, if you happen to meet a person like Cassel, Korbyn, or Sam in real life, RUN.

*****

And there you have it! If you'd like to read the above 12 books (and you should), go buy 'em now:

Above – Leah Bobet
Above World – Jenn Reese
Black Heart – Holly Black
Enchanted – Alethea Kontis
Every Day – David Levithan
Fair Coin – E.C. Myers
Iron Hearted Violet – Kelly Barnhill
Railsea – China Miéville
Seraphina – Rachel Hartman
Summer of the Mariposas – Guadalupe Garcia McCall
The Diviners – Libba Bray
Vessel – Sarah Beth Durst